Sometimes the things we say without thinking can live in ou…

Sometimes the things we say without thinking can live in our minds forever.

About fifteen years ago, when my son was just three, I said something that still makes my chest ache whenever I remember it. We lived in Oceanside, California back then, and one sunny afternoon I took him to a farmers market.

There was this cute little booth where kids were making crafts popsicle sticks, paper, glue, googly eyes, the whole thing. He was so proud of his creation, even though the eyes were upside down and the glue was all over the place.

Without thinking, I said something like, “You tried really hard, but you’re not very good at using glue.” I didn’t mean it in a cruel way I just said it like an observation. I’m autistic, so sometimes my words come out too literal, too blunt. To me it felt like just stating a fact.

A young woman at the booth gently told me that maybe I shouldn’t say things like that to a toddler. And instead of listening, I doubled down. I even said something about how my dad was strict and critical and that I turned out fine. Then I flipped my hair and walked away like I’d won an argument that didn’t even matter.

Looking back, it breaks my heart. That stranger was right. She saw something I didn’t that words stick, that love should sound like gentleness, especially when your child is still learning what love means.

My son is grown now. He’s in college, happy, kind, successful. He really did turn out great. But I still think about that moment often. Not with guilt anymore, but with gratitude for the lesson. Whoever that young woman was, she helped me grow into a softer version of myself.

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