I caused people to drop out of university because of a lie I told, and I still carry the weight of it.

I started university in September 2019, full of the usual nerves and excitement, and by March 2020 everything collapsed into chaos because of COVID. We were all sent home, campuses shut down, and exams that were meant to be in person suddenly became online and open book.

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It felt like no one really knew what the rules were anymore, but at the same time, the university was very clear about one thing. We were not allowed to discuss exam content while exams were ongoing. That was classified as academic misconduct.

Like most courses, we had a Facebook group chat. It started out harmless. Support, reminders, memes, people venting. But when exam season arrived, things shifted. Essay questions were released at 9:00, and once you opened the exam, you had about three hours to submit. Despite the rules, people began sharing the exam questions in the group chat. Some students were seeing the questions early, planning their essays, even writing parts of them before their own exam window started.

One student spoke up during an exam and said this wasn’t okay. She was immediately mocked and taunted by others, accused of being uptight and ruining things for everyone. I remember reading the messages and feeling uncomfortable, but also overwhelmed and unsure what to do.

Without thinking it through properly, I made a terrible decision. I went to an anonymous Facebook confession page that wasn’t affiliated with the university and submitted a post saying that I had reported the entire group chat for cheating during an exam. I claimed it had been flagged as academic misconduct and that people likely wouldn’t pass the year.

None of that was true. I hadn’t reported anyone. I hadn’t contacted the university at all.

After posting it, I went to sleep.

When I woke up the next morning, my phone was flooded. Over 500 messages in the group chat. People were panicking, spiraling, accusing each other, losing their minds. Fear took over the entire space. What I didn’t expect was what happened next.

The students who had actually been sharing exam questions got scared enough that they contacted the university themselves. They wanted to explain, defend their actions, and get ahead of the situation. The university, until that point, had no idea anything had happened. In trying to protect themselves, they ended up incriminating themselves.

A few weeks later, the university sent out an email addressing academic misconduct related to online exams. I later found out that several people dropped out of university entirely.

That’s the part that still makes my chest tighten. I didn’t just cause panic. My lie set off a chain reaction that changed people’s lives. Even though they technically broke the rules themselves, the situation only came to light because of fear I created through deception.

I feel deeply ashamed of that. Ashamed that I lied. Ashamed that I let people believe something false. Ashamed that my words caused anxiety, stress, and real consequences for others. What haunts me most is knowing that people didn’t just get scared, they walked away from their education.

I can’t undo it. I can’t explain myself without exposing what I did. All I can do is sit with the guilt and acknowledge that a careless lie, told in a moment of thoughtlessness, had real and lasting impact.

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