My best friend married the dumbest woman I have ever met💔 .I never thought I would lose a twenty year friendship over something like this, but here I am sitting with this heavy mix of sadness, frustration, disappointment and honestly disbelief. My best friend married the dumbest woman I have ever met in my life and it has completely ruined our friendship. They have been together since high school and I genuinely think he stayed with her because he never believed he could find someone better, so he settled and convinced himself it was fine.

Now he is a doctor with two kids, but she makes every decision about their upbringing and it is like watching a slow moving disaster. She refuses to let them go to school because she does not trust what teachers might teach them.

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She is homeschooling them even though she failed her teaching certification exams three different times and eventually gave up on that career because she could not pass.

Their kids have no vaccines at all. When I asked him why he allowed this even though he is vaccinated and works in the medical field, he admitted that he simply did not want to have the fight with her. Hearing that made something in me break. I lost so much respect for him in that moment.

It hurts because we grew up together. We knew each other since middle school. He used to be the most driven, intelligent, ambitious guy. Now he looks like the shell of that person, like he gave up pieces of himself to keep the peace in his own home. I finally told them that I could not trust them to be godparents for my daughter anymore. We fundamentally disagree on how they are raising their kids and I cannot pretend everything is fine. That was the moment our twenty plus year friendship basically died.

A lot of people asked for more context so here is the full picture. His wife used to be in education but she was fired from multiple schools because she could not perform. Her last job demoted her twice from teacher to aide to library assistant before they finally let her go. She never got her teaching license because she could not pass any of the certification exams. She took them repeatedly and failed every single time. The last count was three before she finally gave up.

They were not like this when we were younger. In our early twenties she was into fashion, cosmetics and even competed in a couple of local pageants. She only tried teaching because her mother was a teacher.

Everything changed when they moved to a semi rural area. She became extremely religious out of nowhere. The homeschooling and the anti science mindset came shortly after that. Autism runs on his side of the family. His brother is high functioning and genuinely brilliant in robotics. Her sister also has a child with autism but she blames vaccines despite the fact that autism is present on both sides of their extended families.

We grew up in the Caribbean so for us godparents and legal guardians are basically interchangeable. They were listed in our will as the people who would take our daughter if something ever happened to us. I could not ignore the reality anymore. If he will not advocate for his own kids despite his education and expertise he will never be able to advocate for mine. We are in the process of changing our will now.

It is painful to watch someone you love lose themselves like this. It feels like grieving a person who is still alive.

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