Last year, on new year's Eve, my boyfriend handed me his phone to take a picture of him at dinner. While I was adjusting the camera, a message banner dropped. I remember it like it was just this evening 'I miss you too. Last night was heavenly.'

I froze. My brain stalled. My hands went cold. He was smiling, waiting. Asking why I was taking so long, so I laughed. I took the photo, handed it back like nothing had happened.

That night, I lay next to him listening to his breathing, replaying the words LAST NIGHT WAS HEAVENLY until they stopped sounding like words and started feeling like proof. He had returned from a 'business trip' that day, had claimed to be happy to be back, but, he was in another's arms, while I was waiting for him...wishing him a safe journey, praying for more clients...I felt like a huge fool. Kept wondering how I could have been so blind, so stupid, so careless with my heart...I cried so much that night.

I didn’t confront him the next day. Or the day after. Instead, I watched him more closely than I ever had.

I noticed how easily he lied about small things. How often his phone was face-down. How gentle he became when he sensed distance.

A week later, I asked him calmly if there was someone else.

He paused. Just for a second. Then he said no.

That pause told me everything.

I didn’t scream. I didn’t beg. I packed my things quietly over the next few days and left while he was at work.

He texted me later asking why I didn’t fight for us.

I didn’t reply.

To this day, I haven't replied. But sometimes I wonder if I should have fought for us...if I gave up too quickly...