Healing from an abusive relationship #healing #traumabonding #abuse

Content warning: abusive relationships. When I filmed the first part of this video I thought I was just going through a horribly difficult break up from a toxic relationship. It wasn’t until a few months into the healing process, and when I started unpacking in therapy that I was able to accept that I was in an abusive relationship. I remember when my first therapist suggested that I was possibly in a trauma bonded relationship I didn’t want to accept it. I kept making excuses for them and justifying their behaviour towards me. If I can give anyone any advice from this experience I would tell you that you’re not meant to beg your partner to treat you with respect. Your boundaries are meant to be respected and heard. You shouldn’t be living in a constant state of fear, panic and sadness. Your seggsual encounters shouldn’t feel forced and pressured. You’re not meant to ignore your gut feelings, things you’ve seen and be gaslit into believing everything that your partner tells you because if you don’t they’ll have an emotional breakdown and call you crazy. You’re not meant to feel like you have to do everything to keep them calm so they don’t get upset and throw, hit and punch things. Or fear about when the next moment of anger and annoyance occurs. Every case of abuse is different. You deserve to be helped, you deserve to be heard, you deserve to be validated, you deserve to be understood, you deserve to heal.