How to Let Go of a Toxic Person You Love

The older I get the easier it is for me to be alone I will no longer let people take my kindness for weakness people are dropping like flies. I am learning how to love myself at 67 yrs old...... better late than never...!

You let go by facing the truth if the situation and thinking of what's right for you. I lost a lot of love for my Narc (which in a way helped me to let go) because of his abuse and cruelty, and as I fell out of love with him I also stopped loving him. Once all that goes it's easier to face the Trauma Bond and how to break it. 🍒

I have come back four times. Because I could never let go. 😢 Hopefully this time I will be stronger.

I convinced myself that the person who I had fallen in love with wouldn't come back and even it had happened I couldn't have trusted him again to build something together.It's difficult but works.

The problem with this is that if the narcissist watch this video, they'll think exactly the same as me, that they're victim, now they are free and finally do whatever she wants. And I cannot manipulate her anymore😄 Okay....non of that matters for me anymore...true...but it still frustrates me to hell😪

No boundary I set is respected....I am repeatedly told that I should thank God that I have him in my life, and that nothing matters, since he comes home and sleeps with me at night. I think he is sensing that I'm trying to leave because he keeps telling me "I am never going to leave you for anyone, I am never going to turn my back on you" I know its a guilt tactic. He absolutely refuses to leave, so I am actively trying to get an apartment. He has gotten cold towards me, I suppose because I keep calling him out on his bullshit and refuse to believe him anymore. Every time I open my mouth to say something I get the eye roll and he gets angry, telling me "I can't say anything to you anymore".....So frustrating. I know longer argue with him. I just let it out that he's lying then I say nothing else, go about my business. He punishes me by flaunting his cheating in my face. I am waiting to hear if I got an apartment I recently looked out. I hope this time I am strong enough to do what I need to do because I know I deserve better. I want a life that is mine, that is happy

I understand what is going on and who he is. I have full clarity. Letting go of receiving nothing is not that hard. Thank you for your videos. They are enlightening and supportive. Sometimes, we think people can do what you are doing, but who you are in your life is rare.

I love her but she drains me emotionally and I don’t think I’m being loved back 😮

This is the single most question I have asked myself and others. 6 months after being discarded, I still struggle with letting go of the love I have for my person.

The biggest problem is the Toxic person Believes in Their actions, choices, and behavior, and until They see their beliefs are ascew, They'll Never change. As Socrates said, "The secret of change is to focus all your energy NOT on fighting the old, but on building the new." Focus on what YOU WANT, not what needs fixing. L❤ve Yourself

“I’m a narcissist” had me shook

He left me in July but then he started sleeping with me until 2 weeks ago. I wish that I had let go when he walked out of my life. Now it’s like a second death. I feel so heartbroken. I don’t know if I can do this.

I know she's not a bad person, but it's hard accepting that some people are just not good for your well-being no matter the nature of the relationship.

Everything you said is 100% true. I was 32 when i met a person like this. I am now 44. Spent 10 years with this person. I was living on hope that this person would change. On the contrary it seemed to get only worse. I set boundaries and brought the truth out multiple times, but of course then i was always a liar and a back stabber and whatever name is in the dictionary you can think of together with synonyms. And the blame i got for practically everything was almost as i was persecuted for having an opinion as a human being. I sacrificed a lot of my own well being through the years with this person. Because i cared and hoped that things would change and improve. It did not. Lying is easy. But reading humans is difficult. This person i am talking about is 37 years old now... Does not have a job.. Still lives with their mommy and daddy, and obsesses about Japanese cartoons and is still a virgin. Yet this persons siblings moved out and had their own families along time ago (I was to the weddings believe it or not). As i said i lived on hope. Not for s*x but that something would eventually shake this person out their shell. I was wrong. And probably i was naive to think that this person would change as time went on and mature. I was wrong there as well. As the saying goes: Charity begins at home. And that is where we all need to start. With ourselves. I often, more than once over the years said to myself i cant deal with this anymore i have to break it off and leave all this rubbish behind and have a life again! I am suffocating, i am drowning, i cant even be myself without walking on eggshells with this person! But aless it comes a time when even Ghandi said enough is enough. And you have to depart and leave. No matter how hurtful or painful it is. You have to make the best decision for yourself. Because if you do not take care and care about yourself. Then who is going to... Thank you.

I am currently in a very toxic relationship with a bonafide narcissist who keeps reeling me back into the toxicity and I am trying so hard to free myself from this person. Your tips and advice are true gems to help me realize the dysfunction of everything that has been happening. I literally bawled my eyes out as I was listening to the video. Everything that you stated about narcissistic people is true and I just happen to be in a relationship with one. I can’t imagine why I fell into this trap but I will educate myself about this and leave. But it is simply difficult to just get up and leave after investing so much time and energy into a relationship. I literally feel stuck and trapped in a crappy situation that is affecting my mental health. The person that I am with also has mental health issues and a lot of things that he needs to work on. He continuously turns up the charm whenever I leave in order to reel me back in and then once I come back, he starts the same gaslighting, manipulative, abusive and controlling behaviors again and I hate that I cannot just leave. Any advice would help me. Thanks

26 years with my partner, for tooo many years ive hung on to hope and the illusion of how things were supposed to be! instead ive finally came to accept he will never change. Im on my healing journey, its really difficult but im doing this for me. I can only control myself not anyone else.

Someone I know damaged me and I want to forget her completely.

20+ years in a toxic relationship caused my brother to take his life. He left, but that’s when everything came falling down. The realization of letting it go on for so long, for exposing the children to a life inside a toxic relationship. The guilt, the blame, and realizing leaving wasn’t the end, it was only the start to building a new life while still dealing with this toxic person. Losing everything he built, not just this “fake” family life, but also his house, income, his children. Being told she was going to make it very hard on him. Some toxic relationships are deadly, but, it takes 2 to tango, so it is always our own responsibility to end relationships with people who are abusive.

Day 2 finally. Not a tear shed after 10 years. I'm ready for peace.. struggling to want a friendship with someone that treated me so badly.

🎉brilliant. Listening to you Ben is like switching on a light bulb when you've been in the dark for years 20 years in my case. Thank you for what you do 🎉