The "Polyamorous" TikTok Activist Cheating Saga

“I have an ache that lives deep in my womblands” is how I will be excusing myself to the toilet for now on

If I was having unprotected sex with someone and they didn't tell me they were doing the same with a bunch of women, i would have been doing worse then talking on tik tok. That's how STIs are passed.

I'm glad you brought up monogamous people dating polyamorous folks with the expectation that they'll somehow "convert" them into monogamy, because that actually happened to one of my own partners. Needless to say, that relationship did not work out, though thankfully, it was nowhere near as chaotic as this mess.

I have lived so many lifetimes since Womblands.

I was like damn where are all the comments and then i realized this is fresh off the press

I remember watching the drama before "womblands" became viral and couldn't stop laughing pure tears when everyone mistakened Womb, Lance for Womblands

I was in a bdsm discord and there were several fem subs that are monogamous but with male doms that are poly. Every one of them was saying it’s working but you see them gripe about their relationships on the daily. It was so cringe i had to leave the server

Okay so I am a monogamous person. I was in one poly relationship (pushed into it by the other person and it end up being a huge dumpster fire because they assumed I wouldn't be looking for other partners and were upset when I found them). A TON of my friends have healthy poly relationships and a ton of poly people I know assume I am also poly because of my social circle. I will say that when I wanted to casually date after my break up and was upfront about just wanting it to be casual and non monogamous every single "poly guy" that hit me up was no longer interested. I think this is because fuckboys who like to claim they are poly don't actually want to communicate or have clear boundaries. Also the poly men I'm friends with all said "no, I'm not going to chance falling in love with you when I'm 99% sure you're monogamous" and I sincerely appreciate that about them.

6:29 this is exactly how my stbx husband was. He had asked about polyamory a year and a half into our relationship, I told him he could do that, just not with me, and he stayed so I thought we were monogamous. Then, 6 years later, after I’ve given birth to our child, he tries to convince me /we/ should be polyamorous. After I left him I found out he had been cheating on me since I was ~24 weeks pregnant on our 1 year wedding anniversary. He said I had known he wanted to be polyamorous for most of our relationship and tried to place all the blame on me, saying I’m not a real ally, etc. Here’s the other messed up part. The woman he was cheating on me with was 10 years older than me (so almost 40), also married, but in a poly relationship and had been for about a decade. He had told her we were poly but I didn’t want to meet any of his partners, but didn’t tell her I was pregnant. He then proceeded to introduce our child to her without my knowledge. When I finally met this woman after I left him she told me information about their relationship was none of my business because it was private between them, and also my child deserved to see her father supported and loved during this difficult time…. Like ma’am excuse me? You’re a long-term experienced poly person living in an openly in a polyamorous community and somehow you think this type of behavior from my ex is okay? Absolutely insane.

PLEASE KAT, i thought i had successfully excised this random internet nonsense from my headspace . . . i did not anticipate this discourse being resurrected in 2026 . . .

This scandal was so long ago I’m cryin

I rhink the problem with the communication framework is that a lot of people come to discover that they're polyamorous while in a relationship. I'm monogamous and always have been. I haven't been propositioned by poly people, but what has happened is I've been in a relationship with a person who discovered their desire for polyamory while we were together. I genuinely don't believe there was any manipulation or deceit behind it, it was a time of genuine self-discovery that nevertheless meant a lot of hurt on my end and the end of our relationship. I also think that this is where the monogamous experience of poly people as "preachy" or superior comes along. Polyamorous people almost always arrived at their polyamory after a lot of their own self exploration. Which is wonderful! But in my experience a lot of people extend that into the notion that polyamory is the end result of that kind of self exploration, and therefore monogamous people just haven't sone that work yet.

I had no idea the hey colonizer person was still active

The thing I really disliked was the idea that an "elective abortion" means that Chelsea didn't "lose" their baby. "Elective" doesn't mean "I want to do this." It means "no one is going to die in this specific moment if it doesn't happen." A person terminating to go through chemo or because the fetus has a structural abnormality that will cause death shortly after birth are considered "elective." If you want that child but need to abort due to medical reasons, you're gonna experience grief and I don't know why that's so hard to grasp for most people.

often cis men seemingly go into polyamory without doing the work to understand how to maintain healthy relationships and we see this in monogamy/comhet. it gets messy so fast and leaves everyone hating us. its been pretty eye opening for me to see my family/peers treat me like im weird for having multiple relationships, where my partners all know about each other, while cheating is bad yet so normalized that it makes me somehow look weird. im single now and kind of dating. i dont really do dating conventionally but i have since being single. unfortunately ive come across a lot of people who i feel are trying to change me. people have said they "dont want to share me" or that "after im with them i wont want anyone else" or, which is comletely fine, "i need to be the focus". some people will pursue me with the idea of changing me which i find odd. you cant love me as i want to be loved without recognizing that polyamory is part of me. dont get me started on the bisexual polyamory hate and the idea of greediness my lawd my lawd

Wait why would you have unprotected sex with someone when you are not actively trying to have a child? edit: Ah. Vasectomy

Maybe I get this story wrong but I don't care even about the poly aspect of this. Having unprotected sex without telling all of your partners is just wrong, no matter the sexuality.

Most men do not get tested on a regular basis. Choosing to have unprotected sex with someone you haven't met before and you didn't discuss STI's with prior is irresponsible, whether they are monogamous or not. A study from 2015 showed that monogamous and polyamourous people have the same STI rates.

When I came out as poly to my monogamous sibling they told me they would rather people just cheat. I still don't know how to respond to him beyond a what the fuck is wrong with you?! 😂

i remember a lot of other native creators saying he didnt take criticism well and focused too much on his own popularity. cant remember much else besides what was said in this video