Scientists now link friendship to a remarkable range of benefits—both physical and mental: lower blood pressure, stronger immunity, reduced dementia risk, better sleep, and longer life. But technology and the pace of contemporary life threaten our ability to connect. Cutting-edge science reveals how isolation can harm us, while meaningful relationships can heal. Wired for Connection | Full Documentary Find more from this series: https://www.pbs.org/show/wired-for-connection/ This program is made possible by viewers like you. Support your local PBS station: https://www.pbs.org/donate Subscribe to the PBS channel for more clips: https://www.youtube.com/@PBS Enjoy full episodes of your favorite PBS shows anytime, anywhere with the free PBS app: https://to.pbs.org/2QbtzhR FOLLOW US: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/PBS/ X: https://twitter.com/PBS/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/PBS/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@pbs Threads: https://www.threads.net/@pbs #neuroscience #socialscience #humanbehavior Wired for Connection Examine the biological imperative for social bonding, contrasting our evolutionary need for connection with the rising paradox of modern isolation in the digital age. Featuring groundbreaking research, from primate field studies to advanced neuroscience, the film reveals the physiological toll of disconnection across the human lifespan, linking loneliness directly to conditions such as heart disease, immune dysfunction, and cognitive decline. It also showcases how meaningful relationships can heal. A widely-circulated report by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services recently revealed that chronic loneliness impacts our physical health as severely as smoking fifteen cigarettes a day, yet skepticism remains regarding the urgency of this public health threat.
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I am learning to love and accept myself. I am learning to be my own best friend. Some of us can’t find people we can connect with. I haven’t found people to form close friendships with in the city I live in and can’t move. Took years for me to realize I live in the wrong place. Through the internet I found people with similar goals, interests and values. I don’t know them personally, but knowing there are people like me helped me accept myself. They are artists or in academia. You can learn to adapt and nurture yourself, find hobbies etc which is better than trying to fit in with people who don’t understand you and insult you. I don’t feel so alone anymore. I am the best friend ever had.
That’s why an inability to make friends can feel like torture. Even if you’re an introvert it’s nice to have a friend to talk to. So when you end up totally isolated despite trying not to be, it hurts all the more
I am a 56 yr old single, divorced woman. My 3 kids are all grown adults, living on their own. I live alone with my dog. I just signed up yesterday to do volunteer work 2 days a week at a horse rescue ! The more I learn about people, the more I stay away from people & I'd rather be in a barn with beautiful horses.
Listening to this, i should have been dead 25 years ago. I had alot of mental and physical adversities at a young age, still going through it to this day. I have no one, absolutely no support system. Im ready to go home to my heavenly father, not self harm. Just mentally and physically tired
Some of us aren't lonely, just because we're alone 🤷
Welcome to my nuerodivergent life. 55 years of forced isolation due to social norms I was learning in the years before covid and starting to actually have friends the shutdown ended that... and afterwards the not only was the progress I made gone, but I regressed to worse levels of loneliness. Sorry to be a downer, but this video hits very close to home.
That work is our only outlet to socialization says something about how we’ve designed our society. And needing to justify the benefit of connection in terms of productivity is part of that story.
This is why so many people turn to religion and often get drawn into cults. We need secular communities.
Kids that are permitted to use AI chat bots is a crime against humanity.
Hello friends of the friendless 😢❤
People are also being taught to be this way. Human connection relies on balancing: _Positive Face_ (the desire to be liked, valued, and included) _Negative Face_ (the desire for independence and to be left alone). Modern Western culture has devalued positive face. Our social needs are now dismissed as a sign of weakness or "dependency". Seeking connection is dismissed as being needy, people-pleasing, or "codependent". Modern Western culture now hyper-prioritizes negative face. Some of the more extreme negative face acts include things like ghosting, estrangement, and setting controlling "boundaries", or making threats or ultimatums that are framed as "boundaries". People now expect magical frictionless effortless relationships, like in a Disney movie or romcom. This is because culture primes people to have _Destiny Beliefs_ instead of _Growth Beliefs_ . The modern reflex is to swipe away and to "never settle" and look for a "perfect match", Even though there's actually no such thing as a "perfect match" because nobody is perfect. Modern Western culture has shifted toward a hyper-literal mindset that values communication only if it exchanges information. Because of this, _phatic communication_ (small talk used to establish social rapport) is widely devalued as pointless, shallow filler. This literalism ignores how relationships actually work. You cannot just approach a stranger and ask them to be your friend. Small talk acts as a crucial, low-stakes way to establish _common ground_ (from the linguistics term "common ground"). In real-life this question isn't about the weather at all. It is a universal way to establish immediate common ground. Rejecting this phatic communication because it's "boring" and lacks "deep, literal substance" is rejecting the very first step needed to form a meaningful relationship. This is completely different from languages and cultures that are positive face and people oriented. Most countries in the world are actually non-Western and use polychronic time, which is flexible time that is centered on relationships, and spending time with people is considered an essential daily task.
Work is absolutely NOT the place to try to fill your social needs. How about we stop trying to fit in being a human around the ravenous demand of capitalism for our time and attention. I don’t want to make small talk before a meeting at my job. I want it to end as quickly as possible so I can actually engage with my life.
As an autistic adult (and a a child) there are only people that think I'm slow and that I'm just here for their amusement. I try to be friendly, or at least polite, but always end up being bullied. When i refuse to allow people to bully me, I'm then treated as an outcast because I won't cooperate with what they want. This is how every social interaction goes. I'm not the submissive person people first assume that i am, so their initial "friendliness" soon turns to meanness. I don't think I've ever had an actual friend, as I understand the word. Only people attempting to manipulate me for their benefit and then turning on me when i call them out on it. I don't have the urge to treat other people that way, so i don't even understand. I leave other people alone and just want them to leave me alone without having to be mean about it. But I'm almost 50 and haven't managed to achieve that yet, so i doubt it will ever happen.
I love PBS
I’d like to see data on isolation is worse than smoking 15 cig/day. Specially if you are an introvert and if you are into meditation (or something similar).
All this is relevant to adults as well.
Being alone and thriving is the outlier. Perhaps it’s for some biology but for most who say that, you have something else going on. Mistrust of people, trauma, etc. Saying people need people is universally true just like the statement of people use their legs to walk. Are some people born without legs, sure but in general, we are a social species and we need social interaction/each other!
The error with thinking that LLMs will reduce loneliness is failure to account for the Eliza effect. People who bond with LLMs will also experience amplified loneliness and potentially AI-induced psychopathology.
If you or someone you know is experiencing depression or thoughts of suicide, 24/7 counseling is available at: National Suicide & Crisis Lifeline Call or Text 988 Crisis Text Line Text “SAVE” to 741741
I play and coach tennis, the social aspect is very underrated. Play outdoor sports! 🎾